Monday, March 18, 2013

The X-Men Have FEELS! (Issue #57)

JUDGE THE COVER!
"The Sentinels ... Live!"
I prefer to read this as "live", like, as in a concert setting.

Live from New York! It's Sentinel Night! Staring Dan Androyd ... and, um ... other robot/cast member mash ups that would make a great basis for a trending twitter hashtag but that I just can't come up with right now...

LARAINE NEWMANDROID!


SUMMARY!
So, The Sentinels are back and they are attacking Lorna Dane in her apartment. Turns out, that tiny chain really isn't enough to keep an attacker out. (A giant, robot attacker, sure ... but my point stands!) "Who is it?" "Beep Beep. Candygram. Boop Bop." "OH! Well come on ... EEEEEE!"

But, wait! We've not wrapped up the The Living Pharaoh's / Alex Summers is The Power story lines yet! What gives?! Are you trying to B-story me?! How many plots do you expect me to juggle in my head? They expect me to be the Chris Bliss of comics?!

Meanwhile, in the A-story, some Egyptian authorities arrive to sort things out, but it doesn't go well. Since the X-Men are the foreigners, here, the police want to take them into custody. Alex freaks out and zaps some of them, so a huge fight breaks out. During the fracas, Alex runs off into the desert. When brother Scott realizes that Alex is gone, he gets all racist:

Though, to be fair to Scott, they DID show up riding camels.
(I am not joking.)


When the X-Dudes can't find lil' Alex using their eyes, they remember they have a mutant-finding computer. It's back in the states, so they'll have to get left-behind Lorna (a Garbage Pail kid?) to do their mutant-Googling for them. Putting in a Skype video call to Lorna's apartment, it automatically shows a video feed of her digs. I know so many young, attractive, mutant women who would agree to having an instant-on camera installed in their apartment. Despite its creep-factor, it allows us to see that her place has been TRASHED. Since Iceman (having totally forgotten about his beatnik girlfriend, Zelda) is crushing on Lorna, he flips out. it looks like this:

I AM SUPER EMOTING! YARGH! If I had Ice Hair,
I'd be pulling it out by its Ice Roots!


He and Hank head home to check up on her while Scott, Jean, and Warren stay in Egypt to continue the search for Alex ... who has, unbeknownst to the x-searchers, just run afoul of a Sentinel.

The Sentinel's other weapon: Sarcasm.


Back in the states, Bobby and Hank turn on a news program at just the right moment to see that Bolivar Trask's SON is behind the mutant-hunting menace this time. [Bolivar Trask was the guy who originally invented The Sentinels. Like father, like son!]

Is it possible for illustrations to be accused of over acting?!
"WHAAAAAAAA?!?!?!" "SHHHHHHHH!!


So, the kid was around to see his dad create them, but I guess he missed the fact that his dad recanted his ways and destroyed all the Sentinels himself? Oh, right. That's because he repented right before dying. No time to fire off a quick text, first. "Dear son, I was wrong, please do not avenge me." [Man, I wish one day I'll get that text from MY dad!]

As you may have noticed from the screen-caps, this issue's illustrations were BONKERS. So much emotion crammed into every panel. Tortured facial expressions! It was kinda distracting ... but also nice to see someone bring this level of detail to a comic book. We can thank / blame Neal Adams. Which is weird, because he drew the last issue, too, and it is no where near as insane as this one. Thus concludes the historical, non-recap portion of this post.


BONUS GARBAGE: JEAN GREY'S POWERS!
This summary of Jean Grey's powers is only notable because it was written by an icky GIRL! [I didn't know that Marvel let them do a man's job! Oh, but I make fun of the late 60s social mores again! Whee! But, seriously: Chicks, right?!]

Also notable: In this featurette, I think its the first time Jean Grey's telepathy is represented by the color pink. Pink wavy lines. And I remember enough of future X-Men comics to know that pink is the official color of telekinesis!




READ IT YOURSELF!
Follow along by picking up X-Men - Volume 2 Omnibus (Marvel Omnibus)!